Hopes & Dreams

I can't really speak for others, but I suspect I'm not alone when it comes to the hopes and dreams of being in chastity. I talk to quite a few others who are in chastity (or at least are at times) and it seems to me, that no matter what the polls may say, not many really get what they hoped for when they first started out. That is to say, their dreams (mine included) did not fully materialize into reality. At least, not the way they expected them to.

Here's what I perceive as the difference between fantasy and reality:

Fantasy: My KH (Mistress, wife, lover...) will love the idea.

Reality: She may not love it but merely agree to it. Or she may love it. This one is a draw.

Fantasy: I will be kept in chastity for long periods of time.

Reality: Maybe, if there are not physical difficulties AND if she is really into it or... forgets about it.

Fantasy: She will tease me every day and I will become really, REALLY horny!

Reality: She may only tease you occasionally. If your lucky, maybe once a week. But you agreed she could do it ONLY when she wanted to...

Fantasy: I will be getting lots of attention because I will be doing all her chores and mine as well.

Reality: She won't tire of that, but you might. Especially if the teasing you get is far less than you were hoping for.

Fantasy: Even though you might not get many orgasms, there will be LOTS MORE sex!

Reality: Ha! Did you think she was always horny? Guess again chastity-boy.

Fantasy: Even when I am locked up, I will always be thinking about sexually pleasing her (and my next orgasm).

Reality: Again, did you think she was going to suddenly develop an irresistible sexual desire?

So if your chastity isn't going exactly as planned. Remember, you (most likely) asked for it. At the very least, you agreed to it. Next time, perhaps you should include something in your contract about a minimum amount of teasing. Even teasing while you are locked up. If you aren't into pain but she has put tiny little spikes in your cage, you might want to include something about that as well.

I guess what I am saying is, you should have a talk about this whole chastity thing. That is, if you want things to move more in the direction of your fantasies and away from the reality you now have. Just don't get discouraged. I like chastity. And if you do too, then find a way to make it work. There must be a happy medium out there where the both of you can get what you want without either of you feeling too much pressure or that you are being ignored or abused.

Life is what you make of it. Make it good!

nemo