I have recently read a number of blogs
in which men were facing long-term orgasm denial. That, in and unto
itself, is not much to upset about. I mean, three or four months may
not seem very long when compared to, say, a year. What bothers me, is
some of these men make no mention of the teasing they receive during
these times of denial.
I realize that this is only my opinion,
and we all know what those are like, but my wife (Mistress
Ivey) has tried so very hard to make other women realize that
teasing, during a period of denial, is extremely important.
I, personally, believe that teasing is
the most important aspect of a successful chastity relationship. The
type of teasing, and especially the frequency of the teasing are are
the glues that keep the relationship alive. If denied an orgasm for
long periods of time without any (or enough) teasing can cause
negative feelings on the part of male involved.
I am sure that there are many who
(especially if new to chastity) will disagree with me. But let's be
honest. An FLR is not really just about the woman. It's about the
relationship. Whether chastity is involved or not, it is a rare
person who can accept that there will be no sexual contact of any
kind. While I will agree that sexually servicing a woman is a form of
teasing, especially for the chaste, I believe there are many, many
other kinds of teasing that will help keep the relationship, and his
attention, at a peak.
Daily teasing, even if only sexy talk,
is something that works wonders in keeping a man desirous, attentive,
and willing to extend the length of denial. I guess what I am doing
in this post is begging those women who do not do much in the way of
teasing to consider my words. To at least make an attempt to increase
the frequency and, perhaps, the intensity of their teasing when they
extend the denial period beyond a week.
I am sure I will get lots of
disagreement to this, but when you come right down to it, you know I
am right.
nemo
Well, I for one agree with you. I don't crave orgasm nearly as much as I crave teasing.
ReplyDeleteQuite honestly, I don't think you'll get much disagreement at all. Perhaps some from the masochistic submissive group, those who live to suffer, but the rest of us...
ReplyDeleteIf not for regular teasing, I suspect many men would be heading for Home Depot to buy bolt cutters. I would be. Our relationship is 3 parts of kink to 1 part of FLR, and Mrs. Haversackers, as much as she delights in denying me, knows that without teasing, which is really intimacy (cuddling, making out, and even just plain old kissing) with a twist, our relationship as it exists now would fall back into what is was before we began playing the MC game. It was bland by comparison, and not nearly as much fun much fun.
In his comment above, R.A sums it up very well. We crave teasing, and if orgasms fall by the wayside, who cares... I fucking love being horny all the time, and she reaps the benefit of it.
I agree with you 100%. It is quite fun for me to place the control of my orgasms in my wife's very capable hands. But I quickly fall into depression if I don't get some teasing, verbal or physical. A good teasing acknowledges that I am a sexual being - and in a weird way even celebrates it - but shows she is intentional in denying me release. It's like the difference between covertly putting a chastity belt on yourself and having your domme lovingly click the lock and cherishing its key.
ReplyDeleteGive dommes their credit, it must take a fair amount of work and creativity to keep us subs horny and happy!
You will get no disagreement from me. I agree with all of the comments made. I have been on the zero teasing diet. It ended badly.
ReplyDeleteTeasing/stimulation is a must. Except, perhaps, for the group that you point out. They can have it...
Teasing is very important. Even if it is only spoken, texted, or what have you. I have found I can go as long as needed if I get just that little bit. If I am only expected to "behave" myself without and attention or feedback from my wife it is to easy to cheat or the desire to put my wife on the pedestal is lost. It's just like communication. It must flow both ways for it to be effective.
ReplyDeleteVery well said! I think too many women enter into this type of relationship without being willing to put in the day to day work required. Sad, but true.
DeleteYou are correct in all respects. The most poignant aspect of your post is saying, " If denied an orgasm for long periods of time without any (or enough) teasing can cause negative feelings on the part of male involved."
ReplyDeleteIt kills the whole relationship, sends it back to where it first failed, or even deeper.
I agree too, particularly with what m said, that teasing does not necessarily have to be physical. Teasing is important but for me my chastity (which is permanent - almost 4 years now) is as much about a badge of ownership and commitment as it is about sexual denial. I'm in a distance relationship with a very beautiful dominant Goddess I'll never meet in person so the teasing I receive is never directly physical, except for what comes from the device itself which I always perceive as having come from Her anyway - and in one way or another it usually does. My Goddess will send me things (pics, video and audio clips, written pieces) She knows will arouse me, She'll put ideas in my head which will tick away in there until I'm woken in the middle of the night with my cock and balls being pitilessly tormented by my device. She knows just how to push my buttons and is exceptionally good at doing so. I'm also given assignments which She knows will contribute to getting me blue-balled and aching for Her.
ReplyDeletePerhaps it's the permanence of the denial that affects the senses in some way but I find I'm acutely aware of the slightest thing that is likely to arouse me so that I effectively end up teasing myself too. I have quite strong fetishes for beautiful long soft hair and girls in soft sweaters.
This is quite a different kind of T&D/CBT experience to those of you with wives and girlfriends and I can only imagine now the physical delights of the adventures you describe - another torment right there! I have a blog about my experiences if anyone would care to drop by. www.goddessvalentineschastityslave.blogspot.co.uk/