Monday, March 21, 2011

The Cause of Blue Balls

I have a theory about blue balls and what really causes them. I am absolutely sure that this theory would not withstand scientific scrutiny by the medical field, or any other scientific community, for that matter. In fact, I am presenting it here just for your amusement. So relax, it's just a stress reliever for those of you who get all worked up (or too serious) about tease and denial or chastity for that matter.

My theory is that it's not the lack of sex that brings on blue balls. I, myself, have gone up to six months without sex (even masturbation) and not had the problem. It is my belief that it's the constant arousal, combined with denial, that actually causes this problem. To prove my theory, I swallowed a tiny remote controlled camera (with built in mic) and guided it to the source... My balls.

Upon first entering my right ball (just because I am right-handed, no other reason) I noticed there was very little activity. Everything was quiet. In fact, I thought there was no one there at all. But then I realized something, this place makes sperm and right now, they have nothing to do. So I put the camera in record mode and went about my day.

That evening, Mistress called me into the bedroom and instructed me to lay on the bed. She tied me down spread-eagle and began teasing my cock. After about thirty minutes of teasing she edged me and then told me that if I thought I was going to cum I was sadly mistaken.

As worn out as I was, I knew I had check my video log see if there had been any activity. Boy, was there! Some guy came on a loud speaker and shouted for everyone to wake up. Then he started yelling commands. “Production! Get started producing another batch!” And, “The blood's already making him hard, let's get moving!” There were tiny people running everywhere turning knobs, checking gauges, and yelling at other people to everything ready. This went on for about ten minutes and then everything calmed down. The head honcho started telling everyone that, “She is just teasing him right now, so it might be awhile.”

Everyone seemed to relax. As time went by, they seemed to be getting tired. They all sat at their stations, watching the dials and gauges. Once in awhile one would sit up as if he were going to yell something, then he would slouch back down in his seat with a sigh. This kept up for quite some time. Every now and then the head honcho would say something like, “Everyone stay alert. It could happen any time now.” But then, nothing would happen until, finally, he jumped up from his seat and yelled, “This is it! Everybody! Go! Go! Go! … Wait!!! False alarm. Everyone back to your posts.”

There was a great deal activity, again. People turning knobs, pressing buttons, watching monitors and all of that! Then it happened... The head honcho announced that it was all over. He said, “Damn it! The bitch stopped! That's another load wasted! When is she going to let him have an orgasm so we can do our jobs?”

I heard another voice ask, “What do we do with this batch of sperm?” To which the head honcho answered, “Just put them storage, we may be able to use them later.”

There was a big, collective sigh from the entire group and they all left their posts. I guess they were all going back to wherever it was they were before the erection started. Things settled down pretty quickly and, soon, it was as quiet as when I first got the camera in there.

Anyway, back to my theory about blue balls. Remember? This is a blog post about blue balls. In my study of what really goes on inside a guy I have come to the conclusion that it isn't the lack of orgasms that causes blue balls. Well, not in and of itself. I have determined (through this not so scientific study) that a guy can go for years without an orgasm with no hint of blue balls or the pain that usually accompanies said condition.

What causes blue balls (in my humble opinion, guided by this intense study) is the lack of orgasms combined with constant (or quite often, anyway) stimulation of the libido. If the guy involved gets lots of sexual stimulation, combined with no orgasms, then he will develop a case of blue balls. The more stimulation, and the longer he has to wait, the bluer, and more painful, the balls will become.

So there you have it. A man can go for years without an orgasm or a case of blue balls so long as he gets no sexual stimulation. Therefore, I suggest that if you want to avoid blue balls, tell your key holder, Mistress, wife, or whoever, that you simply don't want her to turn you on if you are not going to be allowed to have an orgasm. See how that works for you. (It just makes Mistress tease me more, but your results may vary.)


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